If you’re engaged or thinking about getting married- you probably have an idea in your head about what the day will look like. The good news is that you get to plan the whole thing exactly how you want it. The bad news is that everybody else seems to have an opinion on what it should be like too. If you’re conflicted about what traditions, crowd pleasers or expectations to include on your big day- here are ten things that you absolutely do not have to do when it comes to your wedding.
1. Inviting people who you don’t know or like. This one is self-explanatory and is often way more complicated than simply inviting who you want. There are the obligation invites, reciprocation invites, I invited x because I invited y invites- the list is endless. But when you can, be choosy. There will always be some things you’d change about your wedding looking back, but that doesn’t mean you have to say yes to everything.
2. Throwing the bouquet. It’s 2022. Why are we singling out the girls? Why are we assuming they desperately want to get married too? Why is there suddenly a sports activity at this formal event? I just have so many questions
3. Having a bridal party. Some people have an army of close friends and family ready to celebrate at the drop of a hat, and some don’t. Both is fine. Some people choose not to have a bridal party because they can’t choose who to include, they don’t want to financially burden them with costs of attire, events, etc. - or simply are happy to keep it simple. All are valid- do what fits you and your crew!
4. Removing the garter. It is completely okay if you don’t want your family members to see you or your partner remove a piece of underclothing with their teeth. Does that really need to be said?
5. Have a first dance. Some people don’t like dancing, especially in front of everyone they know- and that’s okay! And if you’re worried other people won’t dance if you don’t do it first, don’t- that’s what the best DJ’s for (click here to find a MC and DJ in Melbourne that’s right for you)!
6. Father traditions. Father-daughter dances and getting walked down the aisle are so important for some people and that’s completely understandable. But if you don’t have a father figure to share this with or feel as though it doesn’t accurately reflect your relationship with them- you don’t have to scramble to make it work. Having your mum walk you down the aisle, walking down alone or scrapping the father-daughter dance completely are just some ways to make your wedding suit your life and relationships better.
7. Have speeches. Not every loved one in your life is comfortable speaking publicly- and while some will rise to the occasion speeches should definitely be a choice not an obligation. That just leaves more time for cake and dancing anyway!
8. Have kids at your wedding. This one can be sooo controversial, but as long as you give people notice to organise childcare- most parents are happy to have a child-free night of revelry!
9. Not seeing each other the night before. This can be a cute tradition, but sometimes it’s just not practical! And let’s be real- you’re probably already living together anyway, right? You can see each other before the wedding and still have a wonderful wedding.
10. Anything you don’t want to do. Period.